Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
