Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I smell like Dick and happiness
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