I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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