just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize