Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize