it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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