this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
