I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
