he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize