You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Randomize
