Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
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