Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
