So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
