I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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