Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
