in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
