He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
