What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
