Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
