I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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