return my video game
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
