If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize