the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I lost the right to judge tonight
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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