That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize