So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize