can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
