do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
