batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
