My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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