The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
