Sponge bath it is.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
