the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
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