Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
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