Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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