Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
