another moral hangover. fuck.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Randomize
