were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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