Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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