I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
