so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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