so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
