He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize