I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize