i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize