My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
