No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
