Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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