I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
