Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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