White coat. Heels.
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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