I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
