Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
