they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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